Week 6 Power Rankings

Apologies for the delays in getting this out. It has not been a wavy time for the champ since getting back from Seattle. I have taken Ls to Alex, the Cactus Jack 6s, and SoCal Edison, just to name a couple things. Not asking for pity here, just your understanding.

Anyways, decent amount of movement in the rankings, but the general tiers remain the same, the top 6 are starting to separate from the bottomfeeders.

Rank. Team (W-L) (Strk) (∆)

Tier 1 - Championship Contenders

1. Erik 👑 (4-1) (W2) (+1)

233.75 points. My PR spreadsheet has you at 2 this week but there's no way I can't not put you at the top after such a performance. This might indeed be the top score in league history- the highest score last season was 214.1, scored Week 11 by none other than Erik. CMC continues to be the single most dominant player in fantasy over the last 2 seasons. Good luck Hurtado 😔 the Pats D is a painful L to take. Trust me I know.

2. Gio 🤷‍♂️ (4-1) (W1) (-1)

Gio unsurprisingly bounced back after dropping a game to his FF daddy. Deshaun Watson may have been the top individual score in league history- no way I'm actually checking that stat but 68 is a lot of points. At the moment, Erik and Gio are the 2 dominant teams in terms of PPG (185 and 183 respectively) and PF (926/919). One more week until the clash of the titans. For now, Gio has business to take care of vs the Enigmatic Ant... leaving points on your bench again dawg?

Tier 2 - Playoff Contenders

3. Roberto 🧗☄️ (4-1) (W4) (-)

Roberto's got the Midas back this season. Aaron Jones victimized multiple fantasy owners, including in MILF, where ya boy's undefeated season has come to an end. Chuckie's team shitting itself this week made up for suspect performances from Roberto's wideouts, who gotta start pulling their weight around here before I can put this guy in Tier 1 comfortably. Another in-tier matchup is next versus the guy I'm gonna roast below.

4. Nauch🦵(3-2) (L1) (-)

Nauch's team didn't cyclically shit itself this week, with an above average performance for his team, but this somewhat hyped matchup was over after Deshaun Watson did a football thing. Diggs continues to cause headaches for those who dare start him. Verbal meme: Nauch is Wolverine holding a picture of Courtland Sutton and Will Fuller making love to each other (Hurtado please make this a reality.) With Roberto up next, it'll be fun to see who wins the battle of disappointing WRs and Stacked RBs Todd Gurley is doubtful for this week. Fire up your Miles Sanders LOL.

5. Cuck (3-2) (L1) (-)

Living and dying by Mike Evans lol. Gotta love that China Chuckie complained I left him at 5 and then proceeds to drop a shit sundae with a nice goose egg cherry on top. I can't roast him too hard on pooping his pants though, trading Bell for an injured Adams and a Kerryon Bye was definitely a dice roll and somewhat accepting an L for the week. Let's hope that move and buying low on DHop is gonna pay off.

Tier 3 - Fringe Playoff Contenders

6. Alex (3-2) (W1) (+3)

Alex has proven that with some solid waiver advice (you're welcome), draft picks hitting (Thielen, Kupp, Engram), and trades going extremely in your favor (flipping Njoku and Diggs for Fuller and Sutton), even the worst team in the league last season can turn it around in a couple of weeks. 0 RB is usually a draft strategy used by bold fantasy owners, but seeing how this season is playing out for Alex, it is starting to show viability. Alex's next matchup vs Chuckie is huge for both teams to rank up, and is probably not even phased missing Engram with his bench WR strength. Once his RB situation is fixed its over for you hoes.

7. Ant 😐 (2-3) (W1) (-)

In a battle of the 1-3's, Russell Wilson went stupid, went dumb, went crazy for another win to give him an edge in the battle of trash teams. Russ is the number 1 QB in fantasy, Fournette's put together 2 solid weeks, and OBJ is really holding Ant back from breaking away from the bottom of the pack. At least his IR is empty for his matchup vs Geehova... if DJ plays this week.

Tier 4 - Season Slipping Away

8. Wings (1-4) (L1) (-2)

I am a sad boi. My splash for Bell was not enough as Alex's Wideouts came out guns ablazing. The other day I pondered how I drafted a lineup that included Ekeler, Dalvin and Russell Wilson. My trade horniness only leads down dark paths. Surely with Darnold coming back Bell and Anderson will become league winners... right? The Cassidys are coming up for me, I may not be the same person after all is said and done.

9. Tottie  (1-4) (L1) (+1)

For the 5th week in a row, Hurtado has given up on the season. Except this time around he had some teeth to the claim after tilting away DHop for an equally as doodoo Juju and a package of picks. Despite this, Hurtado has told me when I reached out to him for comment that he is "trying to trade for another wr and if i can’t then i’m done." Prepare your booty for Erik, there's a long line but I'm sure he can squeeze you in for an appointment this Sunday after he fulfills his Trixie Tang fantasy.

Tier 5 - these jokes write themselves

10. Joe and 5 (-2)

Drops his highest score this season and the third highest score of the week. Loses to the second highest score of the week; been there my boy. The amount of tilt trading he and hurtado did after that loss made me proud, in a disgusting way that is. I play him this week, and judging by my own luck, I'll hold off on any further roasting until the outcome of that game, I'm already piling on the Chuck hate and I gotta play him right after Joe.